Helping Children Cope With a Loved One's Hospitalization (Podcast)

When a loved one is hospitalized, children often find themselves in the middle of a crisis they don’t fully understand. In the midst of an illness, it's easy for caregivers to overlook the youngest members of the family, who may be struggling silently on the sidelines. With the right approach, however, healthcare teams can help protect a child’s emotional well-being during one of the most vulnerable moments of their life.

"Kids feel the full range of emotions when someone they love is in the hospital— anger, fear, confusion, and even joy and playfulness — and they often bounce between them quickly," explains Molly Gleydura, a Certified Child Life Specialist at Cleveland Clinic Main Campus. "Children cope best when they’re given honest, concrete explanations that match their developmental level, and when they’re included in small, meaningful ways — like helping a parent hold a water cup or simply being allowed to ask questions.”

In this special episode of the Nurse Essentials podcast, Gleydura shares advice on how to connect with children, ease their fears and help them understand what’s happening to their loved ones. They discuss:

• Creating a safe space in which children feel comfortable asking questions and voicing their concerns
• Using age-appropriate language to alleviate fears and avoid miscommunication
• When and how to include a child in their loved one's medical care
• Using multidisciplinary caregivers, including child life specialists, to meet the needs of young family members
• Helping families understand and anticipate the needs of their children during a medical crisis

Click the podcast player above to listen to the episode now, or read on for a short, edited excerpt. Check out more Nurse Essentials episodes at my.clevelandclinic.org/podcasts/nurse-essentials or wherever you get your podcasts.

Podcast excerpt

Podcast host Carol Pehotsky, DNP, RN, NEA-BC: What are some common misconceptions children might have about illness and hospitalization?

Gleydura: Kids don't have as advanced an understanding of the medical environment as adults do, so when adults are using nonspecific terminology to describe an illness – like [describing someone] as “sick” – kids often fear that they're going to catch that sickness. The child is not going to catch cancer from their dad, but it's still a worry in their head.

[In some cases] kids think that the sickness they’re seeing is what all their future sicknesses will look like. So, the next time they get a cold, they might worry…they’ll have to go to the hospital. Am I going to lose my hair because of the medicine they're giving me?

Pehotsky: Why is it important for nurses and other adults to be mindful of what they say when children are in the room?

Gleydura: This is such an important point. Research shows that it's best for children to receive news, updates and explanations of what's happening with a loved one from a trusted, known adult in a safe space. So, if [a child] overhears something from a nurse rather than from Mom or Grandma, they [might think] of it as taboo. This isn't for something for me to talk about. This isn't something for me to know. It can cause shame or prompt kids to suppress feelings and questions because they're not sure if they're allowed to talk about them.

Additionally, it's important to be mindful of what's being said because not everything is appropriate to be discussed around children. Different families make those decisions [by] drawing their lines in different places. Families might not feel like the child is old enough or ready to know about some [aspects of an illness]. Planning discussions, for example, can often cause worries in kids that aren't necessary at that time.